I’m sure that’s what you’ve been wondering… I’m still here! I’ve been doing a lot of reading of other people’s words (more on that in a future post), and less writing of what’s been on my heart/mind.
The last few months I’ve been in evaluation mode. Evaluating where I’m at in life, where I’ve been, where I’m going, how I’m loving those around me, and how I’m doing in relationship with others.
In evaluating, I’m seeing where I fall short. I’ve fallen short of my career potential, what season of life I thought I’d be in at 31, being a friend, and loving others well. I’ve been tough on myself, and it’s taken me into a spiral of sorts – an endless cycle of not knowing where I can go back and fix some of these things, where I just have to let go, and where I just need to start fresh in the moment. I’m learning to face the hard parts, to not just shove that crap down, and to deal with them.
I’m finally feeling like I’m coming out of this fog I’ve been in. I’ve seen much grace extended from others, God’s faithfulness in deeper friendships, and best of all – answered prayers. I see a hope with each fresh morning, when I can see new growth, and when I gain a new perspective. The best growth in my head + heart – more peace and more grace for myself!
“For thus says the LORD, ” Behold,
I will extend peace to her like a river,
and the glory of the nations like an overflowing
stream…You shall see, and your heart shall
rejoice; your bones shall flourish like the grass.”
~ Isaiah 66:12,14